Venus in Furs

Venus in Furs may be my new favorite eurotrash/erotic/jazz-horror film.  What is a EEJ-H?  Watch just about anything by Jess Franco and you will find out.  I have not seen many Jess Franco films, but the ones I have seen I love.  They are hip man, groovy.  They have a smokin' vibe, real smooth.  Watching his films is kind of like listening to Les Baxter: really cool although you can't quite explain why.

 Venus in Furs, best I can tell, is about a Jazz musician named Jimmy, who plays a mean horn and looks like he may one day star on T.J. Hooker.  The film begins in Istanbul, home of many great Jazz artists.  Jimmy has buried his horn on the beach-- he doesn't know why.  Luckily he remembers where he buried it and soon he is playing some sweet music.  Unfortunately, a dead woman washing up on the beach interrupts his session.  He knows her, but how?  Right, he saw her raped and killed the night before by Klaus Kinski.  Yes, this is that type of film.

Jimmy moves to Rio and hooks up with the incredibly hot Barbara McNair, who plays Rita, a Jazz singer.  When Jimmy is not having sex with Rita, he wanders around Carnival, which seems to happen every day.  One day he spots Wanda, the woman who washed up on the beach.  Is she a ghost?  Well, Jimmy soon beds her so she must not be a ghost, but what is her deal?  And why do the people involved in her rape (who all also happen to be in Rio except for Klaus) keep getting killed?  And why in one scene is her hair short and in another it is long, then short again? 

Venus is Furs is the type of film Christopher Nolan would have made had he been working in the Sixties and doing lots and lots of LSD.  It is a total mind-trip and you think it is making sense and then you realize it really doesn't.  The film is really about one man's obsession with a woman he couldn't have.  I think.  It is also a bit like The Sixth Sense.  I don't want to spoil it for you, but the ending is exactly the same.  Its like a film M.Night Shyamalan would have made if he was making films in the Sixties, doing lots and lots of LSD, and was talented.

Long live Jazz Horror!  Enjoy the theme song. 

The Edge of Horror: Aguirre, the Wrath of God...

OK, I know it is a pretty lame title, but I couldn't think of anything else for this new series of "non-horror" horror films. Plus, it reminds me of that soap "The Edge of Night." Best name for a soap EVER. So for my first edition of "The Edge of Horror" (cue dramatic music here) I am going to take a look at Aguirre: The Wrath of God, starring the completely bat-shit crazy Klaus Kinski as Don Lope de Aguirre, madman Spanish conquistador. For those not familiar with the historical Aguirre, please check this out: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lope_de_Aguirre But be warned: proper citations are needed....


I am in the midst of a full-on Werner Herzog/Klaus Kinski obsession. Don't ask me why, I don't know how I get myself involved in these things. For a full background on this duo's relationship, might I suggest you check out My Best Fiend: Klaus Kinski by Werner Herzog. It is an awesome documentary and it will make your jaw drop in horror at the behaviour of Mr. Kinski. Of course, I am totally obsessed with him now.....

Look at him! He looks all kinds of crazy. His performance as the mad Conquistador is a thing to behold. Aguirre is an egotistical madman, convinced of his own superiority and unwilling to let anyone stand in his way (much like Kinski himself). On a mission to find the legendary "El Dorado," Aguirre stages a mutiny and then leads his ragtag crew down the Amazon on a journey of fear and madness. Along the way they encounter hostile and cannibalistic Indians and face starvation and disease. All the while Aguirre holds on to his delusions and declares himself ruler of all these lands, even though all he has to his name is a capsizing raft and an army of monkeys. The last few scenes look like the painting "The Raft of the Medusa" only with about 100% more monkeys.

Aguirre's Second in Command....

So why do I consider this film to be "On the Edge of Horror?" First of all it is a tale of madness and fear. Aguirre is mad enough to be a leader, and the poor crew are fearful enough to follow him to certain death. Second, the setting is so remote, so foreign, that one does not know what may be peeking out from behind the trees. More often than not, it is hostile Indians, with their short poisonous spears and their more "fashionable" long ones (see the movie to understand this reference.) Third, the film is rather claustrophobic. The majority of the action takes place on a hastily built raft that is slowly falling apart. And finally, Kinski himself is DAMN SCARY!!! He is creepy and projects controlled craziness so well I would have loved to see what he would have done with a role like Hannibal Lecter. Kinski also has piercing, huge, blue eyes. They are the scariest eyes I have ever seen. Of course, blue eyes tend to freak me out anyway. Blue eyes and men who wear turtlenecks are right at the top of my list of irrational fears. If I ever see a picture of Kinski in a turtleneck I might not sleep for a week.

If I haven't convinced you to watch Aguirre: The Wrath of God yet let me leave you with this little nugget. This film features One Of The Best Decapitation scenes I have ever seen. Trust me, it is awesome.