Wednesday, September 16, 2009

She's a bad Mama Jama....(Grace 2009)

Now no one loves Demon Cannibal Baby movies more than me, but I hate to say that "Grace" was a disappointment. Wait a freaking minute.... This new editor does not have spellcheck.. or am I just stupid and can't find it? I can "Strike through" some shit but I can't spell check? OK, forgive this post. I am going to finish but I can't spell worth a shet so forgive me...

Ok, I switched back to the old editor. What the hell? Like I know how to spell. Seriously, if I am just being stupid and can't find the spellcheck let me know.
Back to "Grace." To be pretentious (spell check) for a moment "Grace" was "obvious."
Any casual filmgoer could guess what was going to happen in this "there is nothing a Mother wouldn't do for her child" film.
I wanted to love this film because bloggers and critics were going ape shit over it, and a couple of people fainted at a screening ( I am learning that this fact does not a good film make.) I was ready to love it because it is a "Women's" horror film (about women, evil women, final girls, demon girl babies, etc...) and it starred Jordan Ladd, who is one of my favorite new horror chicks.
"Grace" starts out well. Madeline (Jordan Ladd) has a great husband and a beautiful home. Besides her Vegan diet and addiction to soy milk she seems like an OK person. She has been trying to get pregnant for a while, and has suffered through two miscarriages. When she finally does get pregnant, Madeline and her husband (who has no backbone) decide to utilize the services of a mid-wife. This particular mid-wife, Patricia, was Madeline's lover back in College. See, this is already getting unnecessarily complicated. Anyway, Madeline and her Husband are in a horrific car accident (in their Hybrid, which didn't run well. This film has a really weird anti-environmental message. The cat who is fed soy milk kills rats.. the hybrid car explodes, the mid-wife is a pissed off ex-lover, the mid-wife's assistant is a crazy jealous bitch, the whole place smells like patchouli, yada, yada,yada.) Husband gets killed, baby in the womb gets killed. Madeline, who is a few chapters short of a book anyway, decides to carry the baby to term. Patricia helps Madeline deliver (in a birthing pool, of course. I lived in Sebastopol, I know people like this. But if you want to deliver your dead baby in a birthing pool be my guest. I don't judge.) Cue shots of dead baby being cradled by a grieving Mother. Somehow Madeline "wills" the baby back to life. Instead of taking her daughter to a hospital, Madeline takes the baby (named Grace) home. All is well until flies start swarming around Grace and she starts to smell of rotting flesh. Oh, she also bleeds from various parts of her body. Still, Madeline does not take her to the hospital. Not because she is a crazy homeopathic Nazi, but because she is really becoming unhinged. Making matters worse is her crazy Mother-in-law, Vivian (played by Gabrielle Rose, the best and most disturbing part of this film.) Vivian is a Judge and a ball-breaker, and she is not taking the death of her only Son well. She becomes convinced that Madeline is crazy (she is right) and concocts a plan to take Grace away from her. This involves massaging her breasts to produce milk so SHE can breast feed Grace. She is in her late 50s. Believe it or not this is not where this film jumps the shark.

My future baby.....
While all of this is going on (there is also some nonsense with the ex-lover mid-wife) Madeline discovers that Grace only likes the taste of human blood. HER blood. As you can imagine, this makes breast feeding difficult. While I was watching this my husband ran into the room because I was screaming "ouch, ew, gross." I had to explain to him that I was fine and I was clutching my breasts because this film was giving me a panic attack.
I was still hoping, trying, to love this film at this point but once the final act started to take place it just became rushed and totally ridiculous (nothing was ridiculous before this, really.) Yes, Vivian gets hers (this is one of the most disturbing performances I have seen in a while,) but people who should be dead are not and some of the "foreshadowing" that takes place earlier in the film just is stupid. The final scene seems patched on, and you are left unsure as to what the filmmaker was trying to say. "Grace" aspires to a message. I was just confused as to what that message was. Is this a feminist film? An environmental film? An anti-environmental film? A demon baby film (yes please!?) I think this could have been a really cool, good film, but it was just complicated by all of this other shit that ruined it. Given a choice between this and "Halloween 2" I say "Grace" all the way baby......but that is not much of an endorsement. Given the choice between "Halloween 2" and "Breakin 2: Electric Boogaloo" I would say "Electric Boogaloo" baby. I actually watched part of that the other day. I have it on DVD. Let me know if you want to borrow.

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