Rue Morgue 200 Dead & Buried 1981

Finally got around to watching Dead & Buried.  This Netflix has been sitting around so long that the company sent my husband a condolence card.  I really only got this because as a kid I was always obsessed with the VHS cover art.  That head rising out of the ground scared the shit out of me!  I never rented it because I couldn't tear myself away from the Nightmare on Elm Streets or Friday the 13ths.  I kind of wish I had watched one of those instead.

Not that Dead & Buried is bad.  It actually has a pretty original storyline and the set-up and setting remind me of a cross between The Twilight Zone and The Fog.  Not a bad combo.  In the little town of Potter's Bluff, the new Sheriff, Dan (James Farentino) is quite frustrated that strangers keep dying in his town.  It doesn't help that he is the worlds WORST detective.  I mean he is the WORST.  In his defense, he has got a lot of weird shit going on.  Robert Englund is his Deputy (so young here!), The Man from Chico and the Man is the oddball town Mortician, and his wife, Janet, not only looks like a porn star but seems to be keeping secrets from him.  Life is tough for James Farentino.

It doesn't take long to figure out who the killers are: it's the entire town!  They go around killing people and taking pictures of the death.  Its like a small town 8MM.  Soon we learn that the dead are not really dead at all: they rise again and join the amateur filmmakers club.

Of course, James Farentino doesn't figure this out.  He is too busy yelling at his wife and looking constipated to solve the crime.  I have nothing against James Farentino, really (rest his soul) but the overacting here is enough to make Donald Pleasance go "take it down a notch James".

It you can't tell by the stills Stan Winston does the special effects and they are awesome.  Jack Albertson (the Man) is great as Dobbs, the Mortician, and the ending has a nice little twist that, again, reminded me of The Twilight Zone.

Ronald Shusett and Dan O'Bannon get the screenwriting credit, although O'Bannon later said he didn't do anything to the script and they added his name to get some play from the success of Alien.  As I said, the idea is original but the action moves very slow.  It's worth a look, but I won't be adding it to the collection.  Might buy the poster though.  Still freaks me out.

Rue Morgue 200: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2

God I love this poster!  As a child of the eighties you got to love this poster.  I finally got around to watching The Texas Chainsaw Massacre Part 2, part of the Rue Morgue 200: Gore section.  TCM 2 is high budget, gory, and funny: everything the original wasn't (OK, the original was kinda funny).  It also runs on a little too long and gets quite boring near the end, something the original also didn't do.  I don't know if there is much of a "point" to TCM 2, but it's kind of fun and it has Bill Moseley in it, so it can't be all bad.

Where to begin.  Thirteen years after the events in the original film, we find ourselves just outside of Dallas, Texas.  Two drunk, obnoxious Eighties College douche bags (were there any other kind) are on their way to a football game.  They call the local radio station from their car phone (how cool) and harass the local DJ "Stretch" (Caroline Williams).   While harassing her over the phone they manage to piss off some local rednecks, whose version of road rage involves a chainsaw.  Yes my friends, the Sawyer family is alive and kicking!

In addition to Grandpa, the Cook, and good old Leatherface, we also get "Chop-Top", played by Bill Moseley.  Truly a vile character, "Chop-Top" manages to be more disgusting that Leatherface himself!  Speaking of Leatherface, he develops a bit of a crush on the DJ Stretch, who, through a series of unfortunate events, finds herself trapped in the Sawyer lair.

On the hunt for the Sawyer family is Lt. "Lefty" Enright (Dennis Hopper), who happens to be the uncle of Sally and Franklin from the first film.  He is obsessed with tracking down the "Chainsaw" killer, so much so that he becomes a maniac himself.  It is a typical crazy Dennis Hopper performance.  He must have really needed the paycheck circa 1986.

You can't take this film seriously and I don't think Director Tobe Hopper intended us do so.  It is silly and ridiculous.  Totally different from the original.  And GORY.  Savini does the effects, which include beheadings and skinnings.  God, I hate when someone gets their face skinned.  It really bugs me.  Happens here, and the poor bastard lives!  I used to hate head trauma in general, but after The Walking Dead I have gotten used to beheadings, bashings, stabbings, and other assorted head related injuries.  But skinning alive?  I can't deal.  I don't think I will be adding TCM 2 to my "must watch" list, but it was enjoyable.  Except for the skinning thing.  Yuck.

Rue Morgue 200: The Blob 1988

This is one of my few "cheats" on the Rue Morgue 200 list.  I have seen The Blob before, in fact, many, many times before.  It was one of the important horror films of my youth, along with The Lost Boys and A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors.  I must have watched this 100 times at slumber parties.  I haven't seen it in 20 years.  Yes, I am that freaking old. 

I didn't love it because I thought Kevin Dillon was hot (gross) but because Shawnee Smith was such an awesome final girl (I still love Shawnee Smith: one of my favorite horror chicks.).  Shawnee plays Meg, a popular cheerleader in this small town, which I first thought was in the Midwest, but turns out it is in Northern California somewhere (where I am from!).  Kevin Dillon is Brian, the town rebel who wears a Michael Jackson poofy shirt under this leather jacket.  This was the 80s.  Things like that happened.  When Meg goes on a date she wears pearls.  Seriously.  It was an awesome time.

A meteor hits town and all of a sudden people are being eaten by pink goop (not Gwyneth Paltrow goop,  but that would be equally terrifying).  Meg and Brian are thrown together because they are the only two people who really know what is going on.  Of course, every adult in this town is an idiot and it is up to the rebel and the cheerleader to save the day.  So classic!

Couple of adult grown up thoughts about this film.  It holds up incredibly well.  Some of the special effects are a bit cheeseball, but everything else is really well done.  I forgot how gory this film was!  I am surprised I liked it as much as a kid (OK, teenager) because I was not a gorehound.  Even as an adult I found myself thinking "This is fucking gory!"  The writers capture small town America very well.  I should have know the minute I saw Jeffrey DeMunn show up as the Sheriff that Frank Darabont was involved in some way!  He was!  He wrote The Blob and Dream Warriors!  Without knowing it my young self was a huge fan of Darabont!  But I still agree him leaving The Walking Dead was a good idea.  Send hate mail to P.O. Box:  I don't give a shit: The Walking Dead is better without him, Palo Alto, California 94306.  Two final adult thoughts: The Blob is very respectful of the source material and in many ways a throwback to 1950's sci-fi horror, and....

Shawnee Smith will always kick ass!

Rue Morgue 200: The Bad Seed

I love "bad children" movies.  Or maybe I just really dislike good children.  In any case, The Bad Seed is the Citizen Kane of bad children films. 

Or should I say the Showgirls of bad children films.  It is a strange mix of camp and genuine terror.  Kind of like Mommie Dearest.

The Bad Seed is the story of little blond Rhoda Penmark, a true sociopath.  I work with some sociopaths so I know one when I see one. (If you happen to work with me and chance upon this blog: I am not talking about you.)  Rhoda is an entitled little twat who kills people when she doesn't get what she wants.  Her Mother, Christine (Nancy Kelly) begins to suspect that her darling little angel is up to no good, and her solution to the whole mess is to drug Rhoda with sleeping pills and then shoot herself in the head.  She should have done the whole thing in reverse because that little beyotch lives.  So does Christine, but with a hole in her face.

 

I skipped a lot but you really have to see this movie to believe it.  Based on a novel by William March, which was then turned into a successful Broadway play, The Bad Seed is, at times, stagey.  There is a whole lot of overacting here but you expect that in a bad child movie.  Patty McCormack is really wonderful a Rhoda, especially during the scenes where she turns on the charm to fool people.  You really sympathize with Christine: how would you react to learning your child was a killer?  Murder-suicide seems like a viable option.  The ending is strange: the play had a pretty dark, twisted ending: the film, not so much.  Warning before viewing: this film drags on forever!  I felt like it took me all day to watch it.  Don't let that scare you off however: it's good, it's creepy, it's camp.

Bay of Blood

 

 A.K.A Twitch of the Death Nerve, a much cooler title in my opinion.  Bay of Blood, directed by Mario Bava, is considered by some the first "slasher film."  It certainly inspired a lot of slasher films.  Does this scene look familiar?

Nothing like two horny teenagers getting staked during sex.  Unlike Friday the 13th, these horny teenagers are euro trash.  Also unlike Friday, there are multiple killers in this bay of blood.

The film starts on a high note: a silent sequence where an old woman in a wheelchair gets murdered.  Her killer, her husband, is quickly dispatched by a knife wielding man in black gloves.  Oh yes, we are in Italian horror territory here.

I just don't think I have ever seen an Italian horror film so gory!  I mean, there is stabbing, beheading, spearing, knifing, strangling, throat slashing, machetes to the face!  13 gruesome murders in all. Trust me: everyone deserves it.

There is a plot of sorts.  Everyone is trying to get their hands on the old lady's will: family, neighbors, euro trash Real Estate Agents.  You think there is only one killer but......... SPOILER ALERT!!

Everyone is a killer.  Everyone is a sleazy asshole and everyone is a killer.  The end.  The bay isn't even that pretty.  I couldn't figure out what the big deal is.  And so many men wearing turtlenecks!  Yuck, I hate men in turtlenecks!!

Honestly I almost feel asleep during this film.  Parts are very, very slow.  So many characters are introduced and then quickly dispatched I had a hard time caring about any of them.  I actually had to go to the Internet to see who one of the last killers was.  Some dude drenched in baking soda showed up at the last minute to do some killing.  Turns out it was the euro trash Real Estate Agent.  Isn't it always?

For Bava fans only.  Apparently this was one of the most controversial films of his career.  It is very gory and dark and nihilistic.  Normally I love that shit but this was a little slow for me.

Rue Morgue Magazine's 200 Alternative Horror Films You Need To See

This is good.  Really.  Find it and buy it.  Although I don't agree with every choice (I hate, and will continue to hate, Red State) a lot of it is spot on!  I was happy to see that I had seen a lot of the films, but not all of them.  So I compiled my own list and spent 20 minutes on Netflix working it out.  (What do you have against A Serbian Film Netflix?  I heard it's lovely.)   Here is my list of Rue Morgue films that I am going to watch this year.  I will tag them Rue Morgue 200.  I like having a project.  Some purpose, you know? 

Some of these films I HAVE seen before, just not in a long time.  Those I will "star".  I mean, how awesome is Event Horizon?  Of course that goes on the list!!

• The Bad Seed*
• A Bay of Blood
• Behind the Mask-The rise of Leslie Vernon
• The Blob 1988*
• Blood Creek
• Bloody Birthday
• TCM 2*
• Calvaire
• Communion
• Cube
• Curse of the Demon
• Curse of the Werewolf
• Dead & Buried
• Dagon
• Demons 1985
• Deranged
• Diabolique 1955*
• Enter the Void
• The Entity
• Event Horizon*
• Father's Day
• Frailty
• Hardware*
• The Haunting of Julia
• Humanoids from the Deep
• House 1977
• I saw the Devil
• Incubus 1965
• The Legend of Boggy Creek
• Lady in a Cage
• Lair of the White Worm
• Let Sleeping Corpses Lie
• Lifeforce
• Lord of Illusions
• The Loved Ones
• The House on Sorority Row*
• Just Before Dawn
• The Prowler
• Stagefright
• The Mothman Prophecies (even though it has Richard Gere in it)
• The New Daughter (I actually own this and have never watched it.)
• Phantasm II
• Raw Meat
• S&Man
• The Sentinel
• Sheitan
• Something Wicked this way comes
• The Spiral Staircase
• The Stendhal Syndrome
• Suicide Club
• Targets
• Toolbox Murder 2004
• The Hunger*
• Dracula (spanish version/also own)
• Vinyan
• Wakewood
• Who can kill a child?

God, have I ever watched a horror movie?  This list is huge!